Fast forward 3 years....to the sound of deafening silence as I laid on the ultrasound exam table awaiting the first glimpse of our second baby....'Is everything OK?' I hesitantly asked the technician. 'Well, ma'am....if I am seeing things correctly, there are TWO heartbeats.' He responded in a very professional manner. 'Wait, what? My baby has two hearts!?' Was the first thought that popped into my mind -- not even considering the fact that, already being a mom to one fiesty 20 month old, I could be pregnant with twins! Well, I was. After the initial shock of essentially hitting the procreation jackpot wore off, and the reality of figuring out the logistics of parenting 3 kids under the age of 3 set in, my husband and I inevitably had to address the proverbial 'elephant in the room'....how were we going to fit everyone and everything in our car!? Although I hated to admit it, the only logical answer was to (gulp) buy a....mini-van.
Now, being a former mini-vanist myself, I understood that there existed many prejudices against those who drove these clunky mom-mobiles, like: min-van drivers are the worst drivers on the road, but I never truly understood it until I became a min-van driver. The problem is not the driver, but the van. Here is a rundown of why I think mini-van drivers have gotten such a bad wrap:
ANYONE who tries to maneuver a vehicle with more blind spots than a submarine, the horsepower of a snail and the turn radius of a stretch limo -- all while having to 1. block out the screams of babies/kids 2. operate more switches than a space shuttle, between the DVD player, radio, voice recognition, video game console, climate controls and back-up camera 3. avoid flying french fry torpedos and chicken nugget bombs and 4. concentrate on actually driving while the drivers around you do everything in their power to pass you or cut you off because they think that YOU are the bad driver.....is bound to be given 'the bird' a time or two :) But, knowing what I know now, I would argue that mini-van drivers have to be some of the most skilled drivers on the road just to be able to accomplish the simple task of getting from point A to point B with the street-deck stacked against them.
So, hopefully you will think twice the next time you are ready to lay on your horn at the crazy mom-mobile in front of you...and if that mom-mobile happens to have this sticker on the back....give me a little 'cred,' it wasn't my fault! :)